Crack jokes sms

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Click here to go to your profile page to complete the process. Yo' Mama is so stupid, she reported her stolen crack to the cops. Q : Did you hear why Rosie O'Donnell got arrested? Q: What's bright eyed and bushy tailed? A: A squirrel on crack. I've just been informed that the NSA no longer has the capability to change a light bulb, but if we give them access to everyone's email and cell phone communications they will hopefully intercept a message that will crack this lightbulb case wide open.

Verse 1: Sellin' crack rocks and shootin' muthafuckas! Verse 2: Police pull me over just 'cause I'm brown. A man walks into work with two black eyes. His boss asks what happened. The man says, "I was sitting behind a big woman at church. When we stood up to sing hymns, I noticed that her dress was caught in her crack, so I pulled it out. She turned around and punched me square in the eye.

He was sitting on the curb, dressed in rags. He had his face in his hands and it looked like he was crying. I felt kinda bad he was all alone, so I went and sat down beside him.

I said, "Are you an orphan, little guy? He managed to crack a small smile. What gave me away? Give them a little crack and a bit of water and they can thrive anywhere. But I stopped going because I was afraid I'd get addicted to crack. Host: "Hello caller, how can I help you.

Soon a strange car pulled up. As she got out of the passenger side she was buttoning her blouse. Nah, you'll crack up because my yolks, are egg-celent Note:I've told this jokeat least 12 dozen times. I was about seven years old—and I saw the cellar door open just a crack. Now my folks had always warned me: Emo, whatever you do, don't go near the cellar door. But I had to see what was on the other side if it killed me, so I went to the cellar door, pushed it open and walked through, and I saw strange, wonderful things—things I had never seen before— like Because it was stuck in the crack.

One of my students. I said "I didn't know that one but I would have a crack at Bohemian Rhapsody. The man said, "I was sitting behind a big woman at church.

A homeless man finds a shiny lamp by the road while trying to find a place to pass the night. Picking it up, the man was just about to shove it in his bag when a genie appeared out of it. Not wanting to waste the wish, the man spent much time to think of the best wish. The genie shook his head. A guy comes home with two black eyes and his wife looks at him in shock and asks how that happened.

He replies: while I was in line at the supermarket I saw this woman with her dress wedged into her butt crack, so I reached down and pulled it out for her, and that's when she turned around and punched me in the face.

He wife then looks at him confused and says: that explains one black eye, but not the other. He then says: well, based on her reaction I assumed she wanted it that way, so I put it back. His roommate looks at him surprised and asks him how on earth it happened. The man says there was a beautiful young woman wearing a formal gown at the party, and he noticed that her dress was riding up the crack of her butt.

So I pulled it out of her crack and she punched me in the face for it! Fella over there sold me a bunch of dominoes, a paint can, a ball, and a mousetrap What in the hell would you need all that junk for? He said I can use it to crack an egg You're such a rube, Goldberg. But I didn't bend down to get it, because I didn't want plumber's crack.

Have you seen the flock of cranes fly over the old mountain at sunrise? Have you seen the great lightning storms crack the sky before making way for a rainbow? Have you seen the fabled tiger as it hunts prey in the forest, quicker than the eye can see? Yes, Sensei. That's the problem. You keep watching stupid shit instead of practicing! It got stuck in a crack!

Just a dad with some dad jokes. A crack head will steal your wallet. A meth head will steal your wallet and spend 20 minutes helping you find it. All their talk about how crystals would "align their chakras and give them powers" made me think they were dumb. How could a rock give them powers?

But then I tried crack. Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Asks fellow hen. She says just to push and out will come an egg. He does that. Suddenly he feels like an earthquake. Wake up!! You pooped over the bed!!! Take this and come back after two weeks. Our advice on Married life. Married life has many ups and downs. May most of yours be between the sheets!

Tom goes to a strip club. Older posts.